Giving Leadership
Every Tuesday and
Thursday night, my entire family eats dinner together. It consists of my wife and I, my daughter and
son-in-law, my twenty-year old son, and a good friend of mine. Throughout my ERAU course curriculum, I often
pose questions and provide discussion topics based upon the course
curriculum. One of our favorite
discussions arose from the “train track” ethical dilemma from a previous
class. However, last week’s dinner
conversation proved to top them all. I
asked each member of my family to take the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)
72-question personality test. It’s been
a week since we took the test and we have not stopped talking about it since.
Going into the
test, no one believed it would identify each member as closely as it has. We read the personality explanations from the
Personality Type Portraits found at http://www.personalitypage.com/portraits.html.
The results were:
-
Me (Steve): ENFJ – The Givers
-
My wife (Laurie): INFJ – The Protectors
-
My daughter (Jessica): ENFP – The Inspirers
-
My son-in-law (Tyler): ENTJ – The Executive
-
My son (Aaron): ESTJ – The Guardians
-
Our friend (Chad) – ISFP – The Artists
-
His girlfriend (Amber) – ISTJ – The Duty Fulfillers
As we read the
results, everyone laughed and agreed with the comments while providing
commentary and examples to support the results.
After all the personality narratives were dissected and discussed,
everyone agreed that the MBTI most accurate was the ENFJ assigned to me. The test provided an uncanny accuracy that
created a window into our family dynamics.
Being an ENFJ
explains why I was so interested in Daniel Goleman’s research toward Emotional Intelligence (EQ). Throughout the book, Goleman talks about how
a high EQ is just as important—and in some cases, even more important—than a
high IQ. Goleman (1995) said, “People
who are able to help soothe their feelings have an especially valued social
commodity; they are the souls others turn to when in greatest emotional
need. We are all part of each other’s
tool kit for emotional change, for better or for worse” (p. 115).
The MBTI test
confirmed my desire to study EQ and my interaction with people. Outside of Lockheed Martin, I spend most of
my time working as a ministry leader at our local church. Averaging between 20-30 hours a week meeting
with people, spending time in church settings, preparing sermons, and
conducting church business is all done on a volunteer basis. Many of my Lockheed counterparts are amazed
that someone would spend that many hours working and serving without pay. What they miss is the MBTI explanation of an
ENTJ. It stated, “ENFJs
are people-focused individuals. They
live in the world of people possibilities. More so than any other type, they have
excellent people skills. They understand
and care about people, and have a special talent for bringing out the best in
others. ENFJ's main interest in life is
giving love, support, and a good time to other people. They are focused on understanding, supporting,
and encouraging others. They make things
happen for people, and get their best personal satisfaction from this.” My pay and my reward for helping and
encouraging people is the reward itself.
Being
a leader as a “Giver” is beneficial because it opens the door to communicate on
an intimate level with people. We are
“straightforward and honest” with a lot of “self-confidence and energy.” In the business world, ENFJs are growing more
and more popular as teams and people-focused strategies become the norm within
businesses. In his book Die Empty, Todd Henry (2013) said, “In
baseball, there is a place on the bat called the ‘sweet spot,’ the best part
with which to strike the ball. It will
send the ball soaring a lot farther than if you hit it even a few fractions of
an inch of the mark with the same effort.
Similarly, you have a ‘sweet spot’ in your life by which you will add
the most unique value through your efforts” (p. 11). As an ENFJ leader, my sweet spot is working
in a social setting serving and inspiring people to become the best possible
version of themselves, whether personally or professionally.
However,
as we all know, sometimes our greatest strength can be our greatest weakness. An underdeveloped Feeling side “may have difficulty making good decisions, and may
rely heavily on other people in the decision-making process.” Recently, the Next Step Research Company
evaluated my leadership and personality profile within a business setting. One of their insights was that I was very
astute at “identifying” problems but needed to continue working on the ability
to “solve” problems. Most of the
population can identify problems; however, the great leaders and managers see
problems AND solutions. My previous
pastor used to say, “Don’t bring me problems, bring me solutions.” As an ENFJ leader, I must seek and study
problems and solutions.
Operating
with a “richly developed insight into what makes people tick” is a great advantage
in leading teams and seeing the growth potential in people. Giving and caring are personality traits that
are globally accepted and warmly appreciated.
Building relationships toward common goals and sharing in the successes
and failures of people allow the ENFJ to thrive. Seeing people walk in their “sweet spot” and
living a life that builds humanity is in essence its own reward. In the end though, as a leader, ENFJs must
remember to protect their most valuable asset: themselves. Without self-awareness and personal care,
there will be little to offer others.
Learning to say “no” and spending the time alone to recharge and relax
is just as important as standing in the middle of a crowd and leading the charge. If Abraham Lincoln, Ronald Reagan, Peyton
Manning, and Barack Obama have mastered the art of an ENFJ lifestyle, then
there is certainly hope for me.
Steve
References:
Henry, T. (2013). Die empty. New York, NY: Penguin Group.
HumanMetrics. (2013). Jung
Typology Test. Retrieved at http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
Goleman, D. (1994). Emotional
intelligence. New York, NY: Bantam Dell.
Personality Page. (n.d.). The
Personality Type Portraits. Retrieved at http://www.personalitypage.com/portraits.html
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